First Fib

[dr_pretentious]

I've been meaning to post about Gareth's first fib, which he told on Sunday. We were out at brunch, with Gareth buckled into a high chair. He doesn't much care for high chairs, and far prefers snuggling in laps. Well, who wouldn't? This time, rather than protest vociferously at being buckled in, he signed milk, the ASL sign we use for nursing. He knows exactly what that sign means. So Dan and I dutifully unstrapped him and settled him into my lap, only to discover that he wasn't the least bit hungry. He was, however, determined to stay right where he was.

"We've just been played," I said.

"Manipulated by a nine-month-old," said Dan.

"You guys are so doomed," said all our brunch companions.

"Gab dah iphphphththth," Gareth declared. He loves blowing raspberries. It probably means something like, I decline to testify on the grounds that I may incriminate myself.

Naturally, we're very proud of him. A fib like that is a big conceptual accomplishment. And, yeah, we're really in for it.

Comments

[siriciryon.livejournal.com]

Oh, man.

R has recently made forays into the "ask the other parent" gambit.

[purpledice.livejournal.com]

I know it's not really my place to be proud, but damned if I ain't!

Not that you shouldn't be proud...

[jasminewind.livejournal.com]

He's at the age where nursing isn't just about eating but also about comfort and company. When he asks for milk, he isn't just asking for the liquid that comes out when he nurses, he's asking for the whole package.

It might look like manipulation & lying, but its really just a differing point of view!

Plus, he knows that if he asks for something he thinks he needs, you are going to give it to him. This is a very good thing as far as I'm concerned. Still cause for much pride!

[elphaba-of-oz.livejournal.com]

Quite possobly the best baby story I've ever heard.

[louiseroho.livejournal.com]

Your son is made of awesome.
Awesome Evil, but awesome none-the-less.

[happy-dr-friend.livejournal.com]

Doomed. Completely doomed. Enjoy.

[laradionne.livejournal.com]

That's tremendously clever! You're right; you are in for a wild parental ride....

[garybart.livejournal.com]

Hey, at least he's lying in order to get closer to you. :-) It's when he starts lying in order to get AWAY from you that you need to start being worried. (And that probably won't happen 'til he's about 14, if ever...)

[dr-pretentious.livejournal.com]

I have so much to look forward to.

I've always been really bad at lying, so I don't generally bother to try it. My sister, however, was really good at it when she was a kid. She outgrew it, but she still bluffs brilliantly. I'll have to call her for advice a lot as Gareth gets more devious.

[dr-pretentious.livejournal.com]

Please, feel free to be proud! You know those Calvert genes are hard at work on his language acquisition.

Re: Not that you shouldn't be proud...

[dr-pretentious.livejournal.com]

That's a much nicer way of looking at it. We're visiting family in Maryland right now, and being surrounded by relatives he doesn't remember has inspired lots of anxious comfort nursing. He's reached the stage where he's physically clingy, and he's really good at holding on. Sometimes trying to put him down is like wrestling a squid. So, okay, comfort and company. I'll buy that.

Sometimes he stares at his hands, wiggling his fingers around, creasing his eyebrows in concentration, and grunting with frustration. It's as if there's something he really wants to tell us, but he can't figure out a sign for it. A near miss wouldn't be surprising.

[dr-pretentious.livejournal.com]

Try this one:

My niece, age two, was riding in the car with her grandfather. Cut off by some fellow motorist, he shouted, "Stupid asshole!" before he remembered he had a toddler in the backseat. Katherine said, "Don't say stupid, Grampa. It's not nice."

[dr-pretentious.livejournal.com]

He just keeps getting cooler.

[dr-pretentious.livejournal.com]

I'm embracing my doom. Also toggling its toes and zerbeting its tummy.

[dr-pretentious.livejournal.com]

As long as all his tricks are this harmless and amusing in retrospect as this one is, it'll be fine. I'm not looking forward to having to follow up deceptions with consequences. Fortunately, we have a while before we really have to be the heavies.

[dr-pretentious.livejournal.com]

My parents had a really clever way of handling that with Pru, who was the difficult kid in our family. They made sure all her friends knew they were welcome for dinner, and the way to their hearts was through their stomachs. Pru wanted to be where her friends were, and her friends wanted to be eating our food.

[happy-dr-friend.livejournal.com]

It's best that way. A well zebreted doom is a happy doom.

[vgnwtch.livejournal.com]

Jennie told me about this, and I laughed till I cried. Of course you and D have a genius baby. It makes perfect sense to me. I suppose that tonight he'll do the same thing he does every night - try to take over the world!

[dr-pretentious.livejournal.com]

That's our boy. He has a long way to go, though. He hasn't figured out how to operate his mind-control ray well enough to keep us from putting his jammies on him at bedtime.

First Joke

[amushink.livejournal.com]

We weren't cool enough to use ASL, but Noa and I had a few signals that we shared while she was pre-verbal, and panting-with-tongue-out meant dog. But dog also sorta meant cat, or racoon. She was a California baby and exposed mostly to me and the young college students/surfers on campus her first year. One day we passed an older tourist lady on our way to campus who had hair teased up on her head in a style that I think of as 'New Jersey Hair Band circa 1986' And ten-month-old Noa looked at the lady and signed 'dog.' I laughed so hard I choked.

Re: Not that you shouldn't be proud...

[happy-dr-friend.livejournal.com]

Does he have a sign for "cuddle" or something similar? Then he could differentiate between wanting to nurse because he was hungry and just wanting a lap to snuggle in.

Re: Not that you shouldn't be proud...

[dr-pretentious.livejournal.com]

That's a really good idea. When you only have a dozen words, close enough ought to count.

Re: First Joke

[dr-pretentious.livejournal.com]

That is too damn funny. Good for Noa!

Jon Bon Jovi, the man who put New Jersey in your concept of mid-80s hair bands, grew up in the next town over from our current digs. He is a Revered Person around here, though not quite as Revered as St. Bruce of Springsteen. I am embarrassed to say I know all the words to "Living on a Prayer"--probably picked up by osmosis, since our drinking water comes from Sayreville. I wonder if a reverse osmosis water filter would clear that up.

[violet-moon25.livejournal.com]

This worked very well for my mom as well. It was also a huge benefit for my best friend (she lived with her father who was practically usless as a parent as well as a terrible cook).

[violet-moon25.livejournal.com]

You are in for it as a parent. I also expect my son to fully embrace the role of bad influence on Gareth. Well, it should be interesting at least...

[dr-pretentious.livejournal.com]

That possibility has occurred to us. We're not just gaining a bad influence--you're gaining a henchman-in-law. How much more chaos do you think Andrew will be able to stir up once he has a minion?