(no subject)

[dr_pretentious]

I can't believe I'm skipping the biggest poetry festival in North America to go to my high school reunion, of all things. It'll be the first time in a decade that I'll miss the Dodge Poetry Festival. There's nobody I haven't already heard on the program this year, and some of the headliners tend to read the same handful of favorite pieces year after year, so it's not as big a bummer as it might be. I'm tramping out a vintage of sour grapes about it: Billy Collins's poem "The Lanyard" is delightful, but he'll probably still be reading it with the identical intonation when the festival runs in 2010.

I'd have liked to hear Joy Harjo again, though.

An old friend from my college literary magazine sends me this consoling headline from the Onion: National Endowment For The Arts Funds Construction Of $1.3 Billion Poem. Now there's a pork barrel project I could get behind.

Comments

[theunveiling.livejournal.com]

Wow. You must *really* have liked high school!

Sorry, I can't relate on that one. :-P

[onyxtwilight.livejournal.com]

I'm tramping out a vintage of sour grapes about it

As long as you don't go loosing the fearful lightning of your terrible swift sword, you're probably in good shape. :-)

[dr-pretentious.livejournal.com]

Actually, high school sucked. It's the handful of people I haven't seen since high school who made it survivable that I'm going for. I made a pact with one of my closest friends from that time that we'd both go, so that even if everyone else there was dreadful, we'd stick together. I really, really want to see her again, and there are friends we've both lost touch with whom we're hoping to find.

High school sucked so much that now when I meet people who claim to have enjoyed their high school years, I can't help regarding them with suspicion--maybe they were the piranhas in their own local ecosystems.

[dr-pretentious.livejournal.com]

That depends on how my former classmates behave. ;)

[tanthe.livejournal.com]

Hi Sarah,

This is Marieke. I figured I'd add your Livejournal after our conversation on Sunday at Makeda's!

You mentioned an article or study about development which I'd love to be able to read if it's available online. Also, what baby sign stuff did you use with your son?

Thanks in advance!

[dr-pretentious.livejournal.com]

Hi, Marieke! It was lovely to catch up with you and your family, and I'm glad we can find each other online. Gareth really enjoyed playing with your kids.

I think the item you're looking for is Einstein Never Used Flash Cards (http://www.amazon.com/Einstein-Never-Used-Flash-Cards/dp/1579546951), a book by two developmental psychologists that gives an overview for laypeople of the current state of the study of the infant brain, and how best to apply the research. They debunk a lot of products and services that claim to be based on the latest brain science, and they talk about what kind of play actually supports learning. (Fortunately for kids, the play that actually works turns out to be a lot of fun. Fortunately for parents, it also turns out to be a lot less expensive than getting all those debunked products and services.)

Dan and I read several books on baby sign, and found that Signing Smart (http://www.amazon.com/Signing-Smart-Babies-Toddlers-Strategy/dp/0312337035/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1222315076&sr=1-1) was the one we liked best. The other baby sign gurus will tell you all about why baby sign is a good idea, but not much about how to use it effectively and with a spirit of fun. Signing Smart has information and activities for use with kids from birth to preschool age, and though I don't remember if there's a lot of text that's specific to special needs kids (there's definitely some), the photos of children using sign are very diverse and include happy images of special needs kids. I'm guessing that it can be hard to find books that show D. pictures of a world that might have him in it.

I didn't get a chance to ask you about your favorite parenting books. Gareth toddled away with me before I could pick your brain much. What do you recommend?

[tanthe.livejournal.com]

I don't actually have many parenting books. I have The Baby Book and The No-Cry Sleep Solution.

The thing is that Dashiell very quickly defied any of the usual developmental categories, and so the Baby Book became pretty useless after a very short while. The whole "by month 4, your child may start trying to sit up" doesn't fly for a kid with developmental delays that put him months behind the curve.

I did like the ideas in the No-Cry Sleep Solution, especially because it addresses a gentle way to help your kids, besides the popular "Cry It Out" method, which isn't one that I'm personally a fan of, and research also doesn't back the method of uncontrolled crying being healthy either. And it also addresses the issues that nursing mothers may face when it seems their kiddo will only fall asleep while on the boob (being that I noticed you nurse Gareth still too). Dashiell's sleep issues were, and are, linked to various other issues we believe, so once again this didn't really get much of a work out with him.

Both books will obviously be more on point with Matilda who is developing at the usual pace.

It's been hard to pinpoint parenting books for special needs kids that I feel might cover enough of the bases with us. Some are very specifically for autistic children, and they generally have very different behavioural issues and needs. It's tough. So with Dashiell we've been winging it a lot with the parenting, and just going by instinct a lot.

The signing also never really got off the ground with him when he was younger, because he didn't have the attention span to watch you sign to him. He was so absorbed in seeking vestibular and sensory input, that he didn't focus on much outside that. This has gotten a lot better in the past year and a half or so though, so that now he can actually concentrate on things beyond the input seeking of that nature. His speech therapist at school is working on signs again with him, and also with pointing, something Dash has never done yet either, besides at himself in a mirror with the accompaniment of "Da!".

Signing with Matilda will pay off a lot earlier I think. And I hope it will help alleviate some of the frustration of communication that they have when they're still so young and lack the oral-motor skills to verbalise what they want. A book about why signing is good is meaningless to me really, I know what signing is good for, I just need one that will give me a good system to use, and a good way to implement it.