Big Happy Announcement
Aug. 17th, 2007 10:58 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dr_pretentiousAnd it's not the one you'd be expecting if you've been reading only the public posts on this journal. No, I haven't sold a novel.
I'm expecting my first child. He's due in mid-October. He's a long awaited, much wished for child. As far as anyone can tell, he and I are both in good health.
What on earth possessed me to wait until I was seven months along before talking about this openly on lj? Well, a couple of agents had requested the full manuscript of the Big Book, and their enthusiasm was such that I thought I might finally catch one of them. Now that their rejections have arrived--cordial, encouraging rejections, with exhortations to query them about future projects--I don't have to worry anymore about giving them a non-writing-related reason to say no, and I don't have to worry about whether I'd be making it harder for an agent to sell my work by talking about the pregnancy here.
My thinking was, if I wondered whether I'd be able to make major revisions with a new baby in the house, I couldn't hold it against any agent or editor who wondered the same.
Now that there's no danger of anyone offering me representation or a book contract before the baby comes, I might as well talk publicly about the best thing that's going on in my life.
Dan and I have been trying for a baby off and on for eight years. The past three years involved lots of fertility specialists. When we finally resorted to IVF it worked on the first try, thank goodness. We've been mostly overjoyed that we're going to be parents, though occasionally the preparation and gestation get overwhelming.
Pregnancy turns out to be hard. This one has been a very normal pregnancy, with lots of normal annoyances and normal inconveniences, but normal isn't always easy. Morning sickness and sciatica are not nearly as pleasant as doing the evening kick count. Making up the baby's Amazon wish list was good nostalgic fun--so many of the books I loved as a kid are still in print--and the hormonal moodiness put me in dire need of good nostalgic fun. Conventional obstetrical management is really problematic, so six months in I fired my OB and found myself an excellent midwife. Things are going well, really. I can even imagine going through all this pregnancy stuff on purpose a second time. But not a third.
The baby's far enough along to have habits. All right, some of them are just reflections of my habits--he wakes up and kicks when my blood sugar goes up--but he does seem to recognize Dan's voice, and to have musical preferences. Fiddle tunes rev him up, and his father's singing voice settles him down. He certainly prefers some of my sleeping positions over others. It's hard to tell much more than that, when kicking is the only mode of communication the little guy has. In the evenings, Dan reads bits of Jane Austen to the belly, and the belly's inhabitant leans to listen.
Back in January, I had only two goals I really cared about for the new year. I wanted to have a baby and to sell a book. Both of them seemed like long shots. One out of two will do just fine.
I'm expecting my first child. He's due in mid-October. He's a long awaited, much wished for child. As far as anyone can tell, he and I are both in good health.
What on earth possessed me to wait until I was seven months along before talking about this openly on lj? Well, a couple of agents had requested the full manuscript of the Big Book, and their enthusiasm was such that I thought I might finally catch one of them. Now that their rejections have arrived--cordial, encouraging rejections, with exhortations to query them about future projects--I don't have to worry anymore about giving them a non-writing-related reason to say no, and I don't have to worry about whether I'd be making it harder for an agent to sell my work by talking about the pregnancy here.
My thinking was, if I wondered whether I'd be able to make major revisions with a new baby in the house, I couldn't hold it against any agent or editor who wondered the same.
Now that there's no danger of anyone offering me representation or a book contract before the baby comes, I might as well talk publicly about the best thing that's going on in my life.
Dan and I have been trying for a baby off and on for eight years. The past three years involved lots of fertility specialists. When we finally resorted to IVF it worked on the first try, thank goodness. We've been mostly overjoyed that we're going to be parents, though occasionally the preparation and gestation get overwhelming.
Pregnancy turns out to be hard. This one has been a very normal pregnancy, with lots of normal annoyances and normal inconveniences, but normal isn't always easy. Morning sickness and sciatica are not nearly as pleasant as doing the evening kick count. Making up the baby's Amazon wish list was good nostalgic fun--so many of the books I loved as a kid are still in print--and the hormonal moodiness put me in dire need of good nostalgic fun. Conventional obstetrical management is really problematic, so six months in I fired my OB and found myself an excellent midwife. Things are going well, really. I can even imagine going through all this pregnancy stuff on purpose a second time. But not a third.
The baby's far enough along to have habits. All right, some of them are just reflections of my habits--he wakes up and kicks when my blood sugar goes up--but he does seem to recognize Dan's voice, and to have musical preferences. Fiddle tunes rev him up, and his father's singing voice settles him down. He certainly prefers some of my sleeping positions over others. It's hard to tell much more than that, when kicking is the only mode of communication the little guy has. In the evenings, Dan reads bits of Jane Austen to the belly, and the belly's inhabitant leans to listen.
Back in January, I had only two goals I really cared about for the new year. I wanted to have a baby and to sell a book. Both of them seemed like long shots. One out of two will do just fine.
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no subject
Date: 2007-08-17 03:43 pm (UTC)But you knew that. :-)
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Date: 2007-08-17 03:44 pm (UTC)Jeez. The kid'll be so depressed by the time s/he's born s/he'll need medication.
Something less angst-ridden, maybe? ;-)
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Date: 2007-08-17 03:50 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-17 03:48 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-17 03:50 pm (UTC)CONGRATULATIONS!!!!
(there was a little spoiler in one of your posts a few months ago, but I figured you were waiting to make a big announcement.
I'm sure the second goal will come soon enough!
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Date: 2007-08-17 03:51 pm (UTC)Gestating Will enjoyed Kippling.
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Date: 2007-08-17 03:53 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-17 03:57 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-17 04:08 pm (UTC)MAO
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Date: 2007-08-17 04:12 pm (UTC)What wonderful news!!!
Best wishes for you, hubby, and your precious baby son.
::HUGS::
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Date: 2007-08-17 04:17 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-17 04:24 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-17 04:26 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-17 04:41 pm (UTC)Sorry - I just couldn't help thinking of you...
ZOMG
Date: 2007-08-17 06:36 pm (UTC)(also, a lovely one of him *in* a pizza box.)
Re: ZOMG
Date: 2007-08-18 07:57 am (UTC)Re: ZOMG
Date: 2007-08-18 04:11 pm (UTC)I'm sure he could tell you were nervous about the pills. As cats go, he was uncannily clever. Your willingness even to attempt to pill him was much appreciated. It can be hard to pill any cat, but to pill a willful cat you don't live with is exceedingly generous.
Re: ZOMG
Date: 2007-08-20 09:48 am (UTC)Wow. That clearly worked amazingly well.
to pill a willful cat you don't live with is exceedingly generous.
:::Polishes halo:::
Yeah, I'm so great.
:::Cough:::
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Date: 2007-08-17 04:54 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-17 05:23 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-17 05:36 pm (UTC)I'm actually due in early Dec. We should do coffee, compare notes!
Cheers, S
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Date: 2007-08-18 04:14 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-18 04:30 pm (UTC)Cheers, Stacy
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Date: 2007-08-17 05:59 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-17 06:56 pm (UTC)One of the best odd bits of advice we got was to set up a private LJ for the little one. It helps cut WAY back on having to tell the same thing multiple times until you're sick of it. (People are STILL asking me about my labor 18 months later, for instance). And, it's a good way to update people, since you'll be tired and time-pressed.
My own recommendation is read things about what to expect during the first year now, because you'll be too tired later. And for some reason, everything will suddenly be written in 6 point font; this magic spell gradually receeds after some months.
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Date: 2007-08-17 06:56 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-17 07:24 pm (UTC)It's the hardest thing you'll ever do, and you'll love it.
Congratulations, again!
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Date: 2007-08-18 04:32 pm (UTC)Seasoned parents all tell me I can't imagine how having a child will change my life, so I've just accepted that I'll be surprised no matter what. No point in worrying about whether I'm ready. It seems to be like marriage, in that you become ready by actually doing it--no readiness is possible before you begin. Meanwhile, I read the how-to books, I enjoy my nieces and my friends' kids, and I practice in the general direction of eventually understanding.
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Date: 2007-08-17 07:41 pm (UTC)Loves and smooches!
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Date: 2007-08-17 08:41 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-18 04:38 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-17 09:16 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-18 07:58 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-18 04:41 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-18 04:59 am (UTC){hugs}
So proud of you!!!!!!
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Date: 2007-08-18 04:44 pm (UTC)You've been indispensable through all of this. You know that, right?
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Date: 2007-08-18 05:27 pm (UTC)I am truly proud of how you have gotten a handle on your power and used it to serve yourself & your baby.
I think you could write about the process to other expectant women. Give them something they rarely see in pregnancy books!
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Date: 2007-08-18 06:42 am (UTC)I am sorry the book was rejected.
By the way- "the baby's Amazon wish list" - link?
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Date: 2007-08-20 04:55 am (UTC)Rejection's kind of normal for a ms that's about 3 times as long as the market favors. Mostly, I try to focus on how tailored, helpful, and encouraging most of the rejections have been.
The wish list is under the name Baby Avery-Davis (http://www.amazon.com/gp/registry/registry.html/105-5934024-9153264?ie=UTF8&type=wishlist&id=15MV8TOYFH315). For reasons still unclear to me, Amazon will not allow me to designate a shipping address for this wish list, but I've emailed them and hope to have that problem cleared up soon.
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Date: 2007-08-20 09:50 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-18 04:54 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-20 05:05 am (UTC)Wonderful News!!
Date: 2007-08-21 01:42 am (UTC)Got any names picked out yet??
Hugs Dove
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Date: 2007-08-21 09:29 am (UTC)Congratulations!!! Sounds like it's a case of one achieved, the other to come... yay you!!! :-)
-Katrina
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Date: 2007-08-22 03:14 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-29 04:06 am (UTC)As for the parenting books, take with a big grain of salt. Everyone has an opinion and is willing to stuff it down your throat and make you feel guilty if you disagree. And it all feels worse when you are exhausted and full of hormones from the pregnancy and birth... I was just thinking about this because I got a new magazine today, Brian Child. I will show you sometime or you can check the web site. I like this magazine a lot because it has much less of the "you should do things this way" mentality.
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Date: 2007-09-03 11:23 pm (UTC)-Steve