The Bad News Is, My Mother-In-Law Has Probably Closed Her Eyes For The Last Time

[dr_pretentious]

When it was just her lungs, her oncologist thought she might make a full recovery.

When her lungs were clear of the cancer, but she had a bunch of little tumors scattered in her brain, her oncologist thought she might have as long as two years.

When she went in for pneumonia and it became clear that her lungs were failing after all, her doctors thought she might have six weeks left.

This afternoon, her oxygen absorption dropped precipitously and hasn't come back up. No one expects her to regain consciousness. Her doctors anticipate that it will all be over in the next couple of days.

When Dan tries to wrap his mind around his mother's stoic acceptance of her mortality, he says, "She's like a mage of Earthsea, walking open-eyed into death. It just holds no fear for her." The books he loved as a child are making it possible now to face the very worst. If I ever meet Ursula Le Guin, I'll have one more thing to thank her for.

Comments

[red-haired-girl.livejournal.com]

If either of you need to talk, I know what it's like to lose a mom, slowly, to cancer.

[amheriksha.livejournal.com]

*hugs for you family* I'm so sorry that it came to this so quickly. I really, truly hope she gets one last chance to be awake and talking to you guys.

[onyxtwilight.livejournal.com]

.

[annathepiper]

Oh geez. This must be so stressful for you both. Hang in there, and come what may, let it be as peaceful as possible.

[purpledice.livejournal.com]

Love, thoughts, and prayers from both of us to both of you. And e-hugs, if that'll help, too. But mostly love.

[jasminewind.livejournal.com]

Love to you, Dan and Gareth...

And Urusla, while I'm at it.

**love**

[kistha.livejournal.com]

Love to you and yours.

Our prayers are with you.

[vgnwtch.livejournal.com]

Much love to the family. And hugs. Lots of them.

[tyellas.livejournal.com]

My thoughts are with your family right now, hon.

[tigira.livejournal.com]

I'm so sorry.
*hugs*

[catpaw67.livejournal.com]

You are all in my thoughts as you go through this transition. It's interesting that we're experiencing our own transition with my grandmother's impending death right now, too. What timing. Please let me know if there is anything I can do to be supportive, and tell Dan that I'm thinking of him.

[ingridsummers.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry. You are in my prayers and thoughts. I know from spouse's mother's passing that no matter how expected or peaceful, it's still a hard loss. He still wants to call her on Friday afternoons (their regular chat time).

transistions

[cthulhia]

hang in there. get sleep and all that. get confidence in what you can cope with. keep stress levels as low as possible.

[skyefyr.livejournal.com]

I'm glad Dan has found something to hold on to that helps him find peace.

I'll keep you guys in my thoughts and hope that whatever happens is peaceful. Don't forget to take care of yourselves at this time. It's easy to forget.

[oldsma.livejournal.com]

Dan and you are in my thoughts.

MAO

[elphaba-of-oz.livejournal.com]

May this transition be as easy as it can for all of you.

[shakti-lemaris.livejournal.com]

Hugs and warmth to all involved.

[kjlj.livejournal.com]

Your family is in our prayers.

[wayzgoose.livejournal.com]

My family stood for two days by my mother's bed with the same symptom/results. Her cancer had metastasized to her brain and we all knew she was not going to open her eyes again. But she seemed most relaxed when we were there talking. We kept talking to her the whole time. I sat for a couple of hours the night before she died just telling her stories. The whole family was standing by her bed singing when she died. I'm glad Dan has such strong images to help his acceptance. Our hearts and thoughts go out to you all.

[garybart.livejournal.com]

So sorry to hear this news. It's amazing and inspiring to hear how you're coping with it. Our thoughts are with you guys.

[citabria]

Please send my thoughts and hugs to him for me. With some for you and the wee one, too. {{{hugs}}}

[castalusoria.livejournal.com]

Hugs and healing thoughts to you, D., and your family.